Dr. Joseph Peter Whiteman

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-[[Category:Personages]]+[[Category:Personages]]__NOTOC__
-Hate-filled "love-spreader" Dr. Joseph Peter Whiteman (East Dallas Presbyterian minister) was a vehemenent crusader against just about everything. Improperly touched as a young child by an estranged uncle, Dr. Whiteman saw [[Satan's Dirty Finger]] everywhere. After succesfully closing several East Dallas bars popular for prostitution, he set his sights on Pornographers and Drug Addicts. He knew nothing of the theory of [[Poob Culture]], but he hated it because of the way it sounded. His reckless arrogance destroyed lots of lives. +<table width="100%" border="0" align="right" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0"><tr><td width="*" align="left" valign="top">
 +Hate-filled "love-spreader" Dr. Joseph Peter Whiteman (East Dallas Presbyterian minister) was a vehement crusader against just about everything. Improperly touched as a young child by an estranged uncle, Dr. Whiteman saw [[Satan's Dirty Finger]] everywhere. After successfully closing several East Dallas bars popular for prostitution, he set his sights on Pornographers and Drug Addicts. He knew nothing of the theory of [[Poob Culture]], but he hated it because of the way it sounded. His reckless arrogance destroyed lots of lives.
 +{{Template:Doctors}}
 +Joseph was believed to be the son of a dog and old woman. Other superstitions and beliefs involving confusion of species around individuals and races abound in history. Sexual intercourse with animals would breed monsters with traits from both world, human and animal. Today, more than one on two people still believe that it is possible that a man makes pregnant an animal and vice versa.{{an|1}}
-Joseph was believed to be the son of a dog and old woman. Other superstitions and beliefs involving confusion of species around individuals and races abounds in history. Sexual intercourse with animals would breed monsters with traits from both world, human and animal. Today, more than one on two people still believe that it is possible that a man makes pregant an animal and vice versa.+Famous for his lengthy interview with fiery Texas journalist [[Roscoe Redfern]] in which he denounced [[Mazzistow Carrington]] as "a degenerate nigra" yet still praised his accuracy with a pistol. He added, "....and, as much as I hate to say it, his chicken dumplings are the best I've ever had. We'd had lunch, you see, to 'discuss things'...."
-Famous for his lengthy interview with fiery Texas journalist [[Roscoe Redfern]] in which he denounced [[Mazzistow Carrington]] as "a degenerate nigra" yet still praised his accuracy with a pistol. He added, "....and, as much as I hate to say it, his chicken dumplings are the best I've ever had. We'd had lunch you see, to 'discuss things'...."+Whiteman's own mother declared his ideas to be “unfit for human consumption,” adding with a sympathic touch of motherly irony that, “his bark, however, is worse than his bite.
== See Also == == See Also ==
-*[[Incidentalist Dead Flesh Bonanza]]+ 
-*[[Poob]]+----
 +* [[Incidentalist Dead Flesh Bonanza]]
 +* [[Poob]]
 +* [[The Simulacrumists]]
 + 
 +== Notes ==
 + 
 +----
 +<font style="font-size: 90%">
 +{{anb|1}}For more on this subject, see [[Hunimal]], [[Monstrous Science]] and [[Teratology]].
 +</font>
 + 
 +</td><td width="180px" align="left" valign="top" bgcolor="#CCCCCC" style="margin: 0 0 1em 1em; background: #E0E0E0; border: 1px #aaa solid; border-collapse: collapse; font-size: 100%;">
 + 
 +== Desiderata ==
 + 
 +----
 +<font style="font-size: 90%">
 +''Whiteman's physician'' once noted that Whiteman "used his zygomatic major in a most distinctive manner. Rather reminds me of a pork chop. Or perhaps a mastiff. Yes, perhaps that's it. Hmm."
 + 
 +''According to his personal biographer,'' "Joe has a tenacious grip on reality".
 + 
 +</font>
 +</td>
 +</tr>
 +</table>

Current revision

Hate-filled "love-spreader" Dr. Joseph Peter Whiteman (East Dallas Presbyterian minister) was a vehement crusader against just about everything. Improperly touched as a young child by an estranged uncle, Dr. Whiteman saw Satan's Dirty Finger everywhere. After successfully closing several East Dallas bars popular for prostitution, he set his sights on Pornographers and Drug Addicts. He knew nothing of the theory of Poob Culture, but he hated it because of the way it sounded. His reckless arrogance destroyed lots of lives.

Doctors and Professors of Note

Joseph was believed to be the son of a dog and old woman. Other superstitions and beliefs involving confusion of species around individuals and races abound in history. Sexual intercourse with animals would breed monsters with traits from both world, human and animal. Today, more than one on two people still believe that it is possible that a man makes pregnant an animal and vice versa.1 

Famous for his lengthy interview with fiery Texas journalist Roscoe Redfern in which he denounced Mazzistow Carrington as "a degenerate nigra" yet still praised his accuracy with a pistol. He added, "....and, as much as I hate to say it, his chicken dumplings are the best I've ever had. We'd had lunch, you see, to 'discuss things'...."

Whiteman's own mother declared his ideas to be “unfit for human consumption,” adding with a sympathic touch of motherly irony that, “his bark, however, is worse than his bite.”

See Also


Notes


Note 1:  For more on this subject, see Hunimal, Monstrous Science and Teratology.

Desiderata


Whiteman's physician once noted that Whiteman "used his zygomatic major in a most distinctive manner. Rather reminds me of a pork chop. Or perhaps a mastiff. Yes, perhaps that's it. Hmm."

According to his personal biographer, "Joe has a tenacious grip on reality".