Christopher Andrews Stephenson III

From Plastic Tub

Chechozlavakian, 1928-1987. Literary Critic, Lecturer, Art Collecter, Motivational Instructor. He was second in command, under John P. Merriweather, of The League of Gnomes.

Hello America

Vaclav Andrewcowski (1901-1942) fled Nazi-occuppied Poland with his wife Helga and little son Christoph and emigrated to America, arriving at lady liberty's feet like so many before them -- electronically tagged, deloused and hungry for a new life. Not long after the family changed its name -- and as the paper work churned, turning a cherished family name into it's Anglicized pot-sore, the elder Vaclav passed away, coughing blood in a bed made for vagrants. Penniless and sorrow-struck, Helga and Christopher-Andrews moved to California where Helga would soon marry a Political Science Professor named Mason Stephenson. He would adopt young Christopher and began tutoring him immediately. Christoph was an incredibly gifted child who was constantly awarded for his academic achievements.

Hello World

By the mid-1950's Christopher would be on his way to international success. His progressive ideas about individual empowerment preceded the explosion of numerous self-help gurus throughout the 1970's and 1980's. His ideas about Quantam Ethics would eventually unravel Socio-economic mode predicators. Much of his earlier works were appropriated by the French School of [Post-Structuralism (]. Eventually he would quit teaching and would travel the world consulting wealthy Art Collectors and giving the occasional lecture.

Often times Christopher would seem to disappear from the limelight. It was not rare for some obscure literary journal somewhere to receive cryptic letters, and amateur literary sleuths would pat themselves on the back, assured that they had been targeted by the wonderful Mr. Stephenson, until another journal would recieve a contradictory letter and insult the sleuths as "quickly-fooled dimwits." He released several volumes of convuluted insults and putdowns in grand metaphoric rhyme. He grew restless and took to wandering. A chance encounter with John P. Merriweather at Bangcock Willie's bar in Philadelphia would forever change his life.

Doctors and Professors of Note

Darkness My Old Friend

Much has been written about Merriweather and Stephenson's infamous escapades with The League of Gnomes. It is widely understood that his membership was infrequent and primarily ceremonial. Although there is little evidence of his involvement in some of the more radical experiments of the League, many still believe that he controlled every move from afar. During these years Stephenson's wereabouts were unknown. He was a constant world traveler and his postmarked letters, if to be believed sent sequentially, would paint a picture of a man hopping about the globe with no real pattern or purpose.

Stephenson would eventually meet Easton W. Wunderkidd, the man who would become his esteemed biographer. Wunderkidd was another well-connected world player and soon introduced him to the South American Media Starlet Maria Madrid Mantu. Mantu was a leading proponent of Theosophy ( and surrounded herself with a wide range of eccentrics, including Dr. Peter Von Fondle and Mazzistow Carrington. Christopher Andrew Stephenson III and Maria Madrid Mantu rapidly fell in love and were married Christmas Day 1959.

Math Goes Pop

Maria Madrid Mantu's influential cabal of friends were quick to financially back Stephenson in his new adventure, Quantam Ethics for the People. Stephenson fine-tuned his Socio-economic mode predicators and applied them to what we now call Pop-Psycology to create a doctine that the world would soon embrace. Maria put her Media Machine in overdrive and kept herself busy arranging fundraisers and focus-groups. Stephenson became reclusive once again and began spending more time conferring with Merriweather and the League of Gnomes who were now openly engaged with The League of Men with Fancy Gloves, a "diabolical" secret society.

Mantu's Devotedly lost circle of Amatuer Mystics and Rouge Psycologists would be the first group to go through the indoctrination process when it was still in its prototype stages. He unashamedly charged them a small fortune to take part in his great experiment and funneled much of the money back to Merriweather who was now involved in several risky adventures with several mysterious organizatons.

Apogee Everafter

Stephenson would soon be involved in the genesis of what would later be called Puti-Porn. A scandalous cache of 16th-century oil paintings graphically depicting children engaged in sexual activities with cherubs and incubi was secretly uncovered from a 15th-century church in a small village in the south of France by parties who wish to remain anonymous and thier current representative was eager to make a transaction.

Cleo James Thurstunwell, Whose connections with several questionable religious groups is well documented and who in turn was doing his best just to keep breathing tipped off Merriweather, who in turn tipped off Stephenson, to the existence of the paintings and the intending sell off. Stephenson was not aware if Merriweather was privledged to the knowledge that Thurstonwell had been recently disbarred (in Absentia) by The League of Men with Fancy Gloves for his supposed involvement in the unusual death of Ryan O'Donnely.

According to Thurstunwell's questionable diary supposedly from the same year The Holder of the collection claims that the paintings have been in hiding since the 17th-century and their private heritage owes its life to a secret sex society nested in the complex nether regions of the Mass Heiarchical Behemoth known as the Catholic Church. Thurstentunwell convinced Merriwerather that the paintings were fantastically erotic and of the finest workmanship and considering their peculiar history and subject matter, would seem a must have for an Art Collector of such caliber as Christopher Andrews Stephenson III.


In his later years, Stephenson took to compulsively scripting the figure "64" on scraps of paper.

Stephenson never blinked.