Teratology

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teratology n. 1. The bastard child of alchemy and the Mother Church of Europe; a branch of monstrous science that restricts itself to the study and creation of monsters. 2. Psychological inquiry into that which ought to be left alone; the systematic posing of questions that ought not be asked. 3. Major side affect of calcium deficiency.

Extrapolation

I have since secured it, and we call it "What is it?" -- P.T. Barnum writing to friend about Zip, April 4, 18601 

Holy Child Hungry Mind

Alchemists sought to create gold from lead; the Church sought to turn sinners into saints. The darker arts of alchemy explored poisons; the darker agents of the Church explored abominations of nature. The lack of “natural” specimens was but a stumbling block -- drawing on legends of bestiality, Greek explorations into homunculi, and Paracelsus’ investigations of poisons, clandestine operations sought to create new life. Who is the monster? The creation or the creator? Mr. Dareste? A fall guy -- a victim of psy-ops by the Church whose teratological creations extend back well into the days preceding the Renascecne.

Less Talk More Sulphur

The middle ages saw a rash of freelance teratologists obsfucating the old myths with a nefarious blend of Dark Ages hocus-pocus and Molechian spin-offs tempting the unclean with arias of hymnal hymen and elixirs of virgin urine under arrest. The boom in false prophets drove the adventure underground where it operated in the metaphorical basements of the world's major religions: the Tridentine Catholics, the Protestants, Hindus, Sikhs, and Muslims would be horrified to learn that deep in the bowels of their holy sytems there is a secret attempt at the altar of Abraham to right the wrong of God and thus make him real.

In Less Than A Minute

The traveling freakshow, with its own important mythologies, may very well be the most well-known of the modern applications of teratology, finding purpose, as it were, for the experimental byproducts of Priory of Goom research. The intiation rites of the League of Gnomes mirror these teratological processes; one could argue that the Gnomic conversion from human to monster is more than metaphoric as Gnomes climb the ranks. But there is evidence that suggests that these freakshows may be a poor example of the modern style. Dubord's immersion into the origins of the twentieth century's variety of this new magic was exceptional in its scope and was radically cross-disciplined (much to everyones distaste, thus the short run). A quality sample of his style (provided below)is not only prophetic in both vision and language, but is exquisite in its chrono-universalis as to a point as to be a blueprint for a proper and successfull foray into the business of Monstrous Science.

"With clarity one can discern the Molechian influences of our masterful representatives and their protean masters what with their unwavering drive to repress gnostic release and thus create an unholy and eternal cancer that gnaws at the (untranslatable)....of mankind and thus renders him a blind man, a jackass. One would not have to imagine much further than todays Mental Exo-nauts (Bester, Sturgeon et al) to see that the liberation of monstrous science may soon lay in the holy hand of the new high priests of micro-biology and manipulation of the cellular index. Geomantic Bio-Hacking-the Shellyian frost of the cryptocracy is akin to a new sport."

Stem Cell Indeed

Cheny is hated as the most cruel monster and blood-thirsty beast, as he has drenched various parts of the world in blood. -- foriegn ministry spokesperson, N. Korea, June 3, 2005.

Though the alchemeic analogy fell apart long ago when Joseph Merrick spouted poetry and gawkers found a monster in the mirror, the work continues today. As the public eye is drawn towards genetically- modified foods, stem cell research, and hunimals, Chinese “doctors” promise results to unsuspecting foreign women offering cash for miracle fertilization treatments and North Korean scientists use people as they see fit. And in the US, thousands of children go missing every year -- many victims of lone wolves, others falling to various Death Cults, and a select few; who can say? In a more PC era we speak of monstrous deeds instead of monstrous appearance. The Koran states that “each soul is the hostage of its deeds” (Sura 74, v. 38), but is the monster’s soul not held by the unseen hand of its creator? Let he who is without sin cast the first stone. Few are gold, but are only few monsters?

See Also


Notes


Note 1:  Zip was the inspiration for the comic strip Zippy the Pinhead. This quote is from: Saxon, A. H. 1983. page 104. 'Selected letter of P. T. Barnum.' New York: Columbia University Press.

Desiderata


The ancient Mayans worshipped conjoined twins, paying them the highest honor of ritualistic death.

Mary Shelley was inspired to create Frankenstein by her father’s unnaturally strong curiosity for the unnatural.

A 1986 survey found that nearly one third of boys aged 13 to 16 living on dairy farms in the US had carnal knowledge of cattle.