Ostrich

From Plastic Tub

(Difference between revisions)
Revision as of 21:07, 2 May 2005
Adkins (Talk | contribs)

← Go to previous diff
Revision as of 21:10, 2 May 2005
Adkins (Talk | contribs)
Desiderata
Go to next diff →
Line 2: Line 2:
== Desiderata == == Desiderata ==
-:The Ostrich's "official" name, ''Struthio camelus'', Greek means "sparrow camel."+:The Ostrich's "official" name, ''Struthio camelus'', means "sparrow camel."
 + 
 +[[Category:Glossary]]__NOTOC__
 +<table width="100%" border="0" align="right" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0">
 +<tr><td width="*" align="left" valign="top"> '''pig''' ''n.'' '''1.''' Intelligent and succulent omnivore; domesticated swine. '''2.''' Yo mama.
 + 
 +== Usage ==
 + 
 +----
 +"Eat-in? More like a fucking facist ''pig''-out."
 +:– an angry [[Addisson]], in an apparent misunderstanding of the [[Massive Dinner Send-Back]], 1955.
 + 
 +"What you talkin' 'bout, Wilbur?"
 +:- Charlotte, while spinning her web.
 + 
 +== Extrapolation ==
 + 
 +----
 +Common usage and slang is generally extrapolated from the pig defined as a dirty animal and a tasty treat. A ''pig skin'', for example, is tasty. A ''pig-in-a-blanket'', is not what you want to wake up next to.
 + 
 +The AA totem pig was famously aped by William Golding in ''Lord of the Flies''; it's origin, however, is unclear. [[Gnome]] [[psy-ops]] tried to link it to claims of Jew-baiting, but this is doubtful.
 + 
 +== Non Canonical Text ==
 + 
 +----
 +Civilization owes a curiously underappreciated debt to the pig. The domestication of wild boar seems to go hand-in-hand with the transition from hunting and gathering societies to more sedentary agricultural communities.
 + 
 +Of particular note to Western Civilization is the ancient Euro-Aegean custom of offering pigs to the Mother-goddess, who took the form of Demeter to the Greeks.
 + 
 +The sacrificial pig of the pre-Christian initiation ceremonies of the Eleusinian Mysteries was only a step away from the sacrifical lamb of Christian mythology.
 + 
 +== See Also ==
 + 
 +----
 +*[[Dewey Rose]]
 +*[[The Worship of Tits]]
 +*[[Goat]]
 + 
 + 
 +</td>
 +<td width="180px" align="left" valign="top" bgcolor="#CCCCCC" style="margin: 0 0 1em 1em; background: #E0E0E0; border: 1px #aaa solid; border-collapse: collapse; font-size: 100%;">
 +[[Image:Pig.jpg|thumb|center|Yo Mama.]]
 +== Desiderata ==
 + 
 +----
 +<font style="font-size: 92%">
 +''Raw mountain oysters smell'' remarkably like truffles.
 + 
 +''Boars ejaculate a pint'' of semen during half-hour long orgasms.
 + 
 +A boar with no testicles is called a ''barrow''.
 +</font>
 +</td>
 +</tr>
 +</table>
== See Also == == See Also ==
*[[Owl]] *[[Owl]]

Revision as of 21:10, 2 May 2005

Ostrich n. 1. A comical and flightless bird originating in Africa, reaching a height of up to 2.5 metres and capable of running up to 65 km/h, it is farmed all over the world. 2. A phantom of liberty. 3. Gnome parlance for a Liberal.

Desiderata

The Ostrich's "official" name, Struthio camelus, means "sparrow camel."
pig n. 1. Intelligent and succulent omnivore; domesticated swine. 2. Yo mama.

Usage


"Eat-in? More like a fucking facist pig-out."

– an angry Addisson, in an apparent misunderstanding of the Massive Dinner Send-Back, 1955.

"What you talkin' 'bout, Wilbur?"

- Charlotte, while spinning her web.

Extrapolation


Common usage and slang is generally extrapolated from the pig defined as a dirty animal and a tasty treat. A pig skin, for example, is tasty. A pig-in-a-blanket, is not what you want to wake up next to.

The AA totem pig was famously aped by William Golding in Lord of the Flies; it's origin, however, is unclear. Gnome psy-ops tried to link it to claims of Jew-baiting, but this is doubtful.

Non Canonical Text


Civilization owes a curiously underappreciated debt to the pig. The domestication of wild boar seems to go hand-in-hand with the transition from hunting and gathering societies to more sedentary agricultural communities.

Of particular note to Western Civilization is the ancient Euro-Aegean custom of offering pigs to the Mother-goddess, who took the form of Demeter to the Greeks.

The sacrificial pig of the pre-Christian initiation ceremonies of the Eleusinian Mysteries was only a step away from the sacrifical lamb of Christian mythology.

See Also



Yo Mama.
Enlarge
Yo Mama.

Desiderata


Raw mountain oysters smell remarkably like truffles.

Boars ejaculate a pint of semen during half-hour long orgasms.

A boar with no testicles is called a barrow.

See Also