Easton W. Wunderkidd
From Plastic Tub
Born May 5, 1924 in Topeka, Kansas. Died June 30, 1993 in Sarasota, Florida. He arrives through a thin reed used for breathing underwater. He is a trollop-ant. He recieves a five-hectare plot of fertile land just outside Topeka.
Biographer and rare book collector, topographical cartographer, journeyman luthier, experimental composer, and expert gray-tone matcher. Most famous for his 3-volume biography of Christopher Andrews Stephenson III, The Darling of the Crowd. Colour-blind from birth, his services as a human Anti-aliasing (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anti-aliasing) machine provided him with plentiful work in both the modern fields of optics and Quantum Ethics He is famous for the short poem "I did(n't) do(ne) her(,sh3)her."
Average Joe
His incredible ability to mathematically create a two-tone, 3-D image of a subject in his mind and determine evident truths from that data made his career seem like child's play. In later years he would visualize the true personality of a subject and quickly take advantage, fulfilling his many lusts in the redlight gambling districts of major European cities. After some time he became a Master of Disguises.
Language Trouble
Succesfully translating German Poet Yon Milhaus' Seminal work -- 1967's "Life Alphabetically" -- he returned to the field of cartography, where he became familiar with the infamous maritime-critic/renegade cartographer A.W. Slippers. Wunderkidd became increasingly more esoteric and continued to satisfy his thirst for arcane knowledge by taking to touring supposed holy sites around the globe. His briefly held a teaching post at the German School of Re-Design in Costa Rica (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Costa_Rica). led him to his post at the now infamous South American Adventures Of 1948. In San Luis Potosi, Mexico that year he made the aquaintance of Creatine Panderbox. Scholars still dispute his un-authorized biography of Panderbox as a Slander Operation of The League of Gnomes. Although there is little evidence to connect Easton W. Wunderkidd to the League, his infatuation with Christopher Stephenson does leave him suspect.
Desiderata
- Wunderkidd won the International Spelling Bee in 1934 by correctly spelling the word "autocthonic."
Known Works
The Darling of the Crowd, a 3-volume biography of C.A. Stephenson
The Luscious Sequitor, a biography of Creatine Panderbox
How to make yourself look like a turd, a treatise on the art of disguise
The Map makes the Man, a short introduction to Quantum Ethics.
A Tree Falls in the Woods, a collection of short experimental compositions.
Desire and the Dawn of Civilization, a compendium of ancient texts important because Easton Edmund Wunderkidd says so; a show of unsurpassable translation.
Depression and the Second Drink before Noon, a further compendium of ancient texts and the history of self medication in histrio-darwinistic terms.
