Ritual shoplifting
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| - | The physical and clandestine extraction of capitalistic goods usually representing ideas found inadaquate by the leaders of the [[AA]]. The items five-fingered from vendors under secret circumstance usually concerend a political or philosophical viewpoint of the reactionary sort. The taking of random items was used for objectomancy and voodoo purposes but was used predominantly as key magical source for found-object altars similar to the one found in the flophouse room [[Stimes Addisson]] shared with a couple of large rodents and the occasional [[Mazzistow Carrington]](often with gorgeous white women who contrasted with the ghetto environsof the flophouse decor). Although not as extreme as [[Ritual Murder]] Ritual shoplifting is employed by many differant radical groups for many differant purposes. [[The League of Gnomes]] for instance , have an initiaton rite involving the shoplifting of a broom, three lobsters, two one pound bags each of brown and white sugar, and a dozen french vanilla flavored tea-lites. When [[Easton W. Wunderkidd]] was arrested at the tender age of seven for shoplifting a copy of the New York Times Book Review he was quoted on record telling both the mayor and the chief of police that he did so as an act of utmost rebellion against the existential plight that his hometown refused to face or was not smart enough to recognize and also for the incredible statement he could make to the universe concerning the fact that he was finished with all the religion and god stuff and was even prepared to laugh in the face of Karma and to prove it all that was why he has shoplifted the famous book review (and also because it had a new essay by Gore Vidal). | + | '''Ritual Shoplifing''' ''rn.'' '''1.)''' The clandestine extraction of material goods, usually items seen as particularly representative of [[Poob|Pooban]] grotesquerie. The items five-fingered from vendors under this most secret of circumstances served to elucidate reactionary political or philosophical protestations. '''2.)''' Slang phrase used to describe date-rape among sorority cows and poetical He-Men. |
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| + | == Further Extrapolation == | ||
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| + | The taking of random items was used for objectomancy and voodoo purposes but was used predominantly as key magical source for found-object altars similar to the one found in the flophouse room [[Stimes Addisson]] shared with a couple of large rodents and the occasional [[Mazzistow Carrington]](often with gorgeous white women who contrasted with the ghetto environs of the flophouse decor). | ||
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| + | Although not as extreme as [[Ritual Murder]] Ritual shoplifting is employed by many differant radical groups for many differant purposes. [[The League of Gnomes]] for instance , have an initiaton rite involving the shoplifting of a broom, three lobsters, two one pound bags each of brown and white sugar, and a dozen french vanilla flavored tea-lites. | ||
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| + | When [[Easton W. Wunderkidd]] was arrested at the tender age of seven for shoplifting a copy of the New York Times Book Review he was quoted on record telling both the mayor and the chief of police that he did so as an act of utmost rebellion against the existential plight that his hometown refused to face or was not smart enough to recognize and also for the incredible statement he could make to the universe concerning the fact that he was finished with all the religion and god stuff and was even prepared to laugh in the face of Karma and to prove it all that was why he has shoplifted the famous book review (and also because it had a new essay by Gore Vidal). | ||
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| + | Although [[Mazzistow Carrington]] loved the idea and the bounties of Ritual shoplifting, he never participated in the fear that his grandmother would find out. He confessed to [[Stimso Adid]] one evening that he feared nothing more than the wrath of his grandmother, and that the fear of letting her down was the true impetus of his industrious output and also a good deal of the reason he was so good with the ladies. Tha t and that he was black. And could cook. | ||
| + | In her later years [[Verna Cable}} could conceal a mighty brunch beneath her Chanel raincoat and often suprised her many hosts with huge dining masterpieces as if out of nowhere. [[Wilhemina Forkes]] joined the club one crazy summer when she shoplifted two cantaloupe from a grocery store wearing a very small bikini to please a visting poet. | ||
Revision as of 05:14, 23 Sep 2004
Ritual Shoplifing rn. 1.) The clandestine extraction of material goods, usually items seen as particularly representative of Pooban grotesquerie. The items five-fingered from vendors under this most secret of circumstances served to elucidate reactionary political or philosophical protestations. 2.) Slang phrase used to describe date-rape among sorority cows and poetical He-Men.
Further Extrapolation
The taking of random items was used for objectomancy and voodoo purposes but was used predominantly as key magical source for found-object altars similar to the one found in the flophouse room Stimes Addisson shared with a couple of large rodents and the occasional Mazzistow Carrington(often with gorgeous white women who contrasted with the ghetto environs of the flophouse decor).
Although not as extreme as Ritual Murder Ritual shoplifting is employed by many differant radical groups for many differant purposes. The League of Gnomes for instance , have an initiaton rite involving the shoplifting of a broom, three lobsters, two one pound bags each of brown and white sugar, and a dozen french vanilla flavored tea-lites.
When Easton W. Wunderkidd was arrested at the tender age of seven for shoplifting a copy of the New York Times Book Review he was quoted on record telling both the mayor and the chief of police that he did so as an act of utmost rebellion against the existential plight that his hometown refused to face or was not smart enough to recognize and also for the incredible statement he could make to the universe concerning the fact that he was finished with all the religion and god stuff and was even prepared to laugh in the face of Karma and to prove it all that was why he has shoplifted the famous book review (and also because it had a new essay by Gore Vidal).
Although Mazzistow Carrington loved the idea and the bounties of Ritual shoplifting, he never participated in the fear that his grandmother would find out. He confessed to Stimso Adid one evening that he feared nothing more than the wrath of his grandmother, and that the fear of letting her down was the true impetus of his industrious output and also a good deal of the reason he was so good with the ladies. Tha t and that he was black. And could cook. In her later years [[Verna Cable}} could conceal a mighty brunch beneath her Chanel raincoat and often suprised her many hosts with huge dining masterpieces as if out of nowhere. Wilhemina Forkes joined the club one crazy summer when she shoplifted two cantaloupe from a grocery store wearing a very small bikini to please a visting poet.
