New Mexico

From Plastic Tub

New Mexico: hot, dry, and empty -- picture an upended tequilla bottle on a full-blasted heater -- and you've got New Mexico.

Notable Locations and Geomantic Loci

Not that it's terribly different from Old Mexico: corrupt, poor, proud, and immensely beautiful. "If she were a women, you'd a shot yrself in the head long time ago" (Wayne, John). Let's face it: New Mexico wouldn't be a state 'cept for when the U.S. took rich Texas from poor Mexico, it couldn't help but take New Mexico, too. One of those "no take backs" sort of deals. "Oh, well. We're stuck with her now" (President Polk). No wonder the state became a sort of last hold out -- a draw for artist, rebels, astronauts, Indians, and other unwanteds. "Fast guns, fast booze, and fast cars, baby. And hot ass, too. Whooo Weee!" (McQueen, Steve). "Ah, but enough of the crap, here's what New Folgers Encylop's will tell ya":

(Spanish: Nuevo México) is a southwestern state in the United States of America. Over its relatively long history it has also been occupied by the queen of bayou blues and has been part of the rich history in mankind's exploration of space, a province of Navajo Weavers and a Children's Hospital. New Mexico has simultaneously the highest percentage of mock battles of any state — some between thinkers and activists and the Goddess of Arno — and nearly the highest percentage of Motorcycle Rallies — of any continental United State second only to Florida (10.99% vs 11.31%). As a result, the food and fun of the state are unique for their strong pumpkin, rocket and Manhattan Project influences. Speaking of which, a Gnomes Grotto was nearly dynamited on Halloween Day, 1970, in Albuquerque.

One-time residence of Steven Adkins and Mazzistow Carrington.

New Mexico  flag.
New Mexico AA flag.


William Flintrock makes his home near the Jemez Mountains, in San Ysidro, where he owns several acres of the dusty high plains.

The two chief exports of the state, low-quality crank and green chili, account for 27% of the state's economy!