Chrystal Kelp

From Plastic Tub

She comes in billowing guaze which resembles first a flower, then a vagina. She has seen a ghost and wants to talk about it, her jawline encrusted with turquoise and silver. She is given a Llhasa-Apso.

Chrystal Kelp was queen of the eccentrics in Encephalitus City when she lost it all in a bid for a good lay. In 1986, she drugged and then raped a young 17-year old motorcycle enthusiast named Speed Ray. The trial, which dragged on for months, finally resulted in an aquittal when Ray announced that he was pregnant with Kelp's child. Although he later admitted to being "whacked out on crank" when he said it, the jury was significantly bewildered and voted against the prosecution.

Kelp subsequently moved to Santa Fe, New Mexico, where she makes a living giving guided tours dressed as Georgia O'Keefe.