Newton Farnell Jameston
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| [[Category:Personages]]Lovely and belated Professor of ''[[Snack Cake]] Refurbishing'' who died tragically in 1999. His revolutionary work resulted in both the [[DingDing]] and the "[[Choco]] Brand Milk Chocolate Bar." | [[Category:Personages]]Lovely and belated Professor of ''[[Snack Cake]] Refurbishing'' who died tragically in 1999. His revolutionary work resulted in both the [[DingDing]] and the "[[Choco]] Brand Milk Chocolate Bar." | ||
| - | A towering genius in the field, he followed a kind of gargantuan Bauhaus aesthetic. "Make it long and milky in the north. Give it a stubby (if not stubborn) aspect in the warmer climes. A cocoa wafer in the jungles is dandy. A jumbo-bar of soft rich chocolate in the north is the proper candy. I know I may sound like a terrible rime, but I speak the truth. Speers once proposed to airdrop chocolate bars the size of gold bricks onto Los Angeles. ''He'' knew a thing or two. Carcassonne was saved from a siege by the quick thinking of a maiden who catapulted a pig over the city walls. Thinking the city so rich in food that it could disdainfully waste such a precious resource, the attackers quit their cause and picked up their siege engines. The city was saved. And all because of a chocolate pug." | + | A towering genius in the field, he followed a kind of gargantuan Bauhaus aesthetic and taught briefly at the infamous [[German School of Re-Design]]. |
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| + | :''"Make it long and milky in the north. Give it a stubby (if not stubborn) aspect in the warmer climes. A cocoa wafer in the jungles is dandy. A jumbo-bar of soft rich chocolate in the north is the proper candy. I know I may sound like a terrible rime, but I speak the truth. [http://www.s-t.com/daily/07-97/07-16-97/b01li041.htm Speers] once proposed to airdrop chocolate bars the size of gold bricks onto Los Angeles.'' He ''knew a thing or two. Carcassonne was saved from a siege by the quick thinking of a maiden who catapulted a [[pig]] over the city walls. Thinking the city so rich in food that it could disdainfully waste such a precious resource, the attackers quit their cause and packed up their siege engines. The city was saved. And all because of a chocolate pig."'' | ||
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| + | Debate continues to rage as to whether or not Jameston was a member of a [[Choco Cult]]. Although hired by the cult which marketed DingDings, evidence is inconclusive as to whether or not he was a participant in their wilder scheme to create a chocolate [[homunculus]] (Homuncul-os). Most scholars believe he was merely an unwitting ally, a researcher in it for "pure chocolate science"; a small but vocal minority, however, insist that he was on the inside. | ||
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| + | == See Also == | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | *[[Count Chocula]] | ||
Current revision
Lovely and belated Professor of Snack Cake Refurbishing who died tragically in 1999. His revolutionary work resulted in both the DingDing and the "Choco Brand Milk Chocolate Bar."
A towering genius in the field, he followed a kind of gargantuan Bauhaus aesthetic and taught briefly at the infamous German School of Re-Design.
- "Make it long and milky in the north. Give it a stubby (if not stubborn) aspect in the warmer climes. A cocoa wafer in the jungles is dandy. A jumbo-bar of soft rich chocolate in the north is the proper candy. I know I may sound like a terrible rime, but I speak the truth. Speers (http://www.s-t.com/daily/07-97/07-16-97/b01li041.htm) once proposed to airdrop chocolate bars the size of gold bricks onto Los Angeles. He knew a thing or two. Carcassonne was saved from a siege by the quick thinking of a maiden who catapulted a pig over the city walls. Thinking the city so rich in food that it could disdainfully waste such a precious resource, the attackers quit their cause and packed up their siege engines. The city was saved. And all because of a chocolate pig."
Debate continues to rage as to whether or not Jameston was a member of a Choco Cult. Although hired by the cult which marketed DingDings, evidence is inconclusive as to whether or not he was a participant in their wilder scheme to create a chocolate homunculus (Homuncul-os). Most scholars believe he was merely an unwitting ally, a researcher in it for "pure chocolate science"; a small but vocal minority, however, insist that he was on the inside.
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