Guvernor Morris

From Plastic Tub

(Difference between revisions)
Revision as of 01:04, 19 Jun 2005
Payne (Talk | contribs)

← Go to previous diff
Revision as of 12:36, 24 Jun 2005
Payne (Talk | contribs)
links, mostly
Go to next diff →
Line 3: Line 3:
<tr> <tr>
<td width="*" align="left" valign="top"> <td width="*" align="left" valign="top">
-''American. (1752-1816) He doesn't show up until the séance, and then only for a moment, as Albert Kook is skeptical enough to destroy even animism, given a chance, that! He is pure vapor. He receives a comb.''+''American, 1752-1816. He doesn't show up until the séance, and then only for a moment, as Albert Kook is skeptical enough to destroy even animism, given a chance, that! He is pure vapor. He receives a comb.''
-Guv was taking a ride in his sumptuous carriage in Revolutionary France and was set upon by a mob demanding his "liver on a pike." He parleyed with the crowd but to no avail. They began to rock his carriage and thrust their dirty little arms into the windows. All seemed lost but then he had a vision of crutches. Swiftly detaching his wooden leg he thrust it at the crowd and brandished it over his head. "I am a veteran," said he. "I fought with Lafayette at Tripoli! ''Viva la Revolution! Viva La France!''" Awed, the crowd let him pass. He wasn't even late for his game of [[whist]] and after winning big he buggered the Lady d'Auvergne while her maid licked his [[ass|nether eye]].+Guv was taking a ride in his sumptuous carriage in Revolutionary France and was set upon by a mob demanding his "liver on a pike." He parleyed with the crowd but to no avail. They began to rock his carriage and thrust their dirty little arms into the windows. All seemed lost but then he had a vision of crutches. Swiftly [[ablation|detaching his wooden leg]] he thrust it at the crowd and brandished it over his head. "I am a veteran," said he. "I fought with Lafayette at Tripoli! ''Viva la Revolution! Viva La France!''" Awed, the crowd let him pass. He wasn't even late for his game of [[whist]] and after winning big he buggered the Lady d'Auvergne while her maid licked his [[ass|nether eye]].
-Morris died at Morrisania in 1816 at the age of 64 and was buried at St. Anne's Episcopal Churchyard, in the Bronx, New York City.+Morris died at Morrisania in 1816 at the age of 64 and was buried at St. Anne's Episcopal Churchyard, in the Bronx, [[New York City]].
== Known Works == == Known Works ==
Line 14: Line 14:
[http://www.findlaw.com/casecode/constitution/ Constitution of the United States of America], true author. [http://www.findlaw.com/casecode/constitution/ Constitution of the United States of America], true author.
-''[[On this stuff called Poop]]'', 27 scatological sonnets all featuring the word "perpendicular," distributed among friends with dirty drawings by [[Albert Kook]].+''[[On this stuff called Poop]]'', [[27]] scatological sonnets all featuring the word "perpendicular," distributed among friends with dirty drawings by [[Albert Kook]].
== See Also == == See Also ==
---- ----
- +*[[Founding Fathers]]
*[http://www.archives.gov/national_archives_experience/charters/constitution_founding_fathers_pennsylvania.html#Morris_G/ National Archives biography] *[http://www.archives.gov/national_archives_experience/charters/constitution_founding_fathers_pennsylvania.html#Morris_G/ National Archives biography]
*[[Stimes Whelan]] *[[Stimes Whelan]]

Revision as of 12:36, 24 Jun 2005

American, 1752-1816. He doesn't show up until the séance, and then only for a moment, as Albert Kook is skeptical enough to destroy even animism, given a chance, that! He is pure vapor. He receives a comb.

Guv was taking a ride in his sumptuous carriage in Revolutionary France and was set upon by a mob demanding his "liver on a pike." He parleyed with the crowd but to no avail. They began to rock his carriage and thrust their dirty little arms into the windows. All seemed lost but then he had a vision of crutches. Swiftly detaching his wooden leg he thrust it at the crowd and brandished it over his head. "I am a veteran," said he. "I fought with Lafayette at Tripoli! Viva la Revolution! Viva La France!" Awed, the crowd let him pass. He wasn't even late for his game of whist and after winning big he buggered the Lady d'Auvergne while her maid licked his nether eye.

Morris died at Morrisania in 1816 at the age of 64 and was buried at St. Anne's Episcopal Churchyard, in the Bronx, New York City.

Known Works


Constitution of the United States of America (http://www.findlaw.com/casecode/constitution/), true author.

On this stuff called Poop, 27 scatological sonnets all featuring the word "perpendicular," distributed among friends with dirty drawings by Albert Kook.

See Also


Image Courtesy of the Smithsonian
Enlarge
Image Courtesy of the Smithsonian

Desiderata


Morris used the words "swank" and "slattern" to excess.

The study of Guvenor Morris is referred to as "Morrissaneology."

James Madison said of him that he had a "fondness for saying things and advancing doctrines that no one else would."

He was considered to be a brilliant military strategist.