Children in Pants

From Plastic Tub

The letter we received from Nevid Kessar was quite shocking. We were aware of the ongoing feuds between Stimes, Stimso, Buehb, et. al., but the hatred displayed by Kessar was unlike anything we had seen since the crime scene photos of the O'Donnely murder. To say the least, we were quite impressed with his vitriol. I have to paraphrase what we can remember of the letter for it had been carved into the hide of a rotting nuetria. The aroma became unberable and the glass chamber proved not to be as hermetic as advertised. Nevid Kessar left no return address on the simple box the carccass arrived in so we can only hope that he contacts us again so as to see if we can engage him into a bit of Larynical Fisticuffs.

Anyway this is what he had to say about the AA:

  1. That we were nothing more than "An insular coop of cockamamie self-devotees, bathing in hermeneutic circularity."
  2. And that we were all "Slanderous coat-tailers and Mystery Novel spoilers."
  3. He referred to us as "The Royal Cast of crooked histrionicists."
  4. He portrayed our character collectively as "Self-deluded and shamelessly self-promoting."
  5. He defined us as "Proto-fascist language whores with tiring lambastic tirades and retorts ever more desperate."
  6. And something about that thing with the diplomats from Uruguay.

And this is just the first page. He then elaborated on each of the founding members of the AA in what could only be described as uncontrolled envy. This went on for some time before he attacked the administrators at the Plastic Tub. His venom is top notch as he refers to us as:

  1. "Tri-polar mis-enfants d'entitlement."
  2. "Lutheran-baiting and cathechism skewerers."
  3. "Dolphin-surving turtle chokers."

and that:

  1. We are "Suffering from chronic doses of augmented delirium."
  2. We employed "Demented codes of conduct and disconnected hierachies based on whimsy and peculiar fancy."
  3. We exemplified "Distraught and fallacious overtures of the incoherent for the unreasonable."

We like this guy.