German Lampshades

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German Lampshade kil. 1. As a shade catches light, a social convention which forestalls mention of eugenics or straight talk about the filthy. 2. Lampshades manufactured in Germany or by German laborers. 3. A lampshade made from an actual German. 4. euph. A shy and beautiful woman, a wallflower; a trophy wife.

Further Extrapolation


Marching Onward

A counterfeiting gang in Iagoville linked to Ryan O'Donnely produced German Lampshades by the score in the late 1960's, selling them as anti-Semitic gag-gifts. Catering to a largely white-supremacist clientele, they released an astounding array of additional amusing products. For instance, a hook-nosed cock ring was introduced by fiat; then a finger that -- when pulled -- insulted the nearest group of Jewry. In the gang's master-stroke, they produced a lampshade that functioned not only as a world-class adumbrator but also, and perhaps more importantly, as a head-piece for drunken conventioneers and Klansmen in a pinch.

The Photo-Op

Experts agree that most German Lampshades on the market today are cheap-knockoffs made by the Swiss or worse, the French. Further, their post-modern minimilistic design does not allow for their employment as hats.

Dieter Detour

A large contingint of post-sassifiers have recently acknowleded the begruding work of surveying the intellectual wasteland of reformative powersurges as exemplified in the understnding of the supposed holocaust victims in accordance with the conflicting evidence3 offered by the illustrious award of an inherto entitled nation state with its continual holocaust of thier own survival lines by the quote unquote allies?

Non-Canonical Text


There is some dish-flesh on my neck, and that's kind of sinister when you have a lampshade.

Amusing pie-eyed office-mates.

It is reported that "S", group-therapy relapsers, Christmas-addled accountants, solo-performers....Swiss Lamphades are made from hilarious drunks but also warm-up soup and "can melt a pat of butter from ten yards."

Internet porn is a great way to do internet furniture research- father of three, Toledo

See Also