German Lampshades

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German Lampshades kil. 1. As a shade catches light, a social convention which forestalls mention of eugenics or straight talk about the filthy. 2. Lampshades manufactured in Germany or by German laborers. 3. A lampshade made from an actual German. 4. A shy and beautiful woman, a wallflower, an ornament.

Further Extrapolation


Marching Onward

A counterfeiting gang in Iagoville, linked to Ryan O'Donnely, produced German Lampshades by the score in the late 1960's, selling them as anti-semetic gag-gifts. Catering to a largely white-supremacist clientele, they released an astounding array of additional amusing products.

How We Did It

For instance, a hook-nosed cock ring was introduced by fiat; then a finger that -- when pulled -- insulted the nearest group of Jewry. In the gang's msater-stroke, they produced a lampshade that functional not only as a world-class adumbrator but also, and perhaps more importantly, as a head-piece for drunken conventioneers and Klansmen in a pinch.

Desiderata


Most experts agree that most German Lampshades on the market today are cheap-knockoffs made by the Swiss or worse, the French.

Non-Canonical Text


There is some dish-flesh on my neck, and that's kind of sinister when you have a lampshade.

Amusing pie-eyed office-mates.

It is reported that S, group therapy relapsers, Christmas-addled accountants, solo-performerswiss Lamphades are made from hilarious drunks but also warm up soup and "can melt a pat of butter from ten yards."