The Cutlet

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A Drama in Two Acts, by Steven Adkins and Tim Wilson, 1996.

The Cutlet


The cast of characters according to their physiognomic relation to wild beasts:

Stimes Addisson as the envelope;
Teaspins Kudos as the starfish;
Zeus appears in the form of a sperm-whale;
some Cum is the antelope;
some Salt is the donkey;
the Woman is the sea-yage in jelly fish;
a Kidlet the small child.
And of course, the Cutlet, as itself.

"An embryo strangles and dictates." ---?

Act One


The stage is completely dark. The spotlight singulates an envelope which comes swishing onto stage, stripping, opening it's contents. The spotlight widens, revealing a scrubby plain, in the manner of the Great Western Dream. Zues is sitting on a boulder. The cutlet is in a barrel, floating in water. The audience can see inside the barrel due to a contraption that projects it's innards onto a screen, center stage. Two ministers operate the machinery, silently, dressed in black and faceless.

Zeus: (exasperated)

How dare you know?
How dare you conspire?
(The envelope, pausing and working her panties, fraught by ears, perks up.)

The envelope: (slow and basaltic .. the need to eye the finger)

These things will be forgotten; what of it you slinking devils you
outrageous demons slinking away? and what of my fascination for
dythrambia? my wife can cum, I can cum shooting out the down flying
terrorist for five times, my long finger distracted by thumbs, the fact
that inherent in my shimble is an airwave of skin? Yeddy, it is a
ganham!

The Cutlet: (in the barrel to himself)

How about it, Zeus, you high falutin' water spoutin' Ahab fightin'
mislocation?! ... Yer invoked despite yer adrogynous compliance...
(it waves a mit)
The accident is that which precedes perception
that long kid-thing
(now singing despite itself)
an unexpected burst
loving
that which predisposes confusion
in the hallway
a priori
(a startling high note)
to geo-metric perception: given that
the mind repeats itself in nylons, gloating,
still as sweet
as it ever was
still the shoe
upon which
a balustrade lavishes affectation
and importance --
upon the so-called "gods"

Zeus: (hearing now the sweet trilling, bellows)

A HAIRCUT ONE IMPOSES UPON THE I-DEA INITIALLY APPROACHES....!!
(he goes sheepish and begins more humbly)
A frying pan
in which the butter is
waiting for the weight of a Cutlet!
(He spits)

Salt:

the permission of emission

A corsicle bitch:

The insectide kidlet pinches an ear that scorching demeanor

The Starfish:

Her pants are on backwards those insect angles entire baboons

Scene:


The Cutlet is floating in a barrel of rainwater. Nearby, the sperm-whale is musing.

The Cutlet:


               burned by  the tsar 
               bur-- 
               --ned by the 
               tsar 
               a crool excess 
               east of the tsar eaten 
               by the 


Tsar:


               My love a single burp 
                               rinsing instant burns 
                                               Skin made pliant by later-ness 


Cutlet (angrily):


               The dream is a noodle connecting life to life connecting coal to flaming 
               forebrow 


(Scissors

scream out

lacking grace

but smooth as hell

and cool,

besides):


               you pay web boy bun pen 



A corsicle bitch:


               a sodden rage 


Salt:


               a bootheel[1]                               {All: 3 ways to stuff a gullet 


The Cutlet:


               a rattlesnake           


The envelope, strangely reticent:


               Long gram 
                               Imp rat: 


The starfish pipes up:


               4 knees 


The Cutlet:


               burned a 
               tsar --- 
               Pork makes a comeback 
                               makes a revolution in mud 
               metaphorical mud 
                               clings deep 
               drawn out strings 
                               queer loping 
               A new gloved managerie. 



               (Everything arrives 
               on hands and knees 
               looking.) 


A woman (crooning):


               -- twenty thousand of my men. 
               Sit on my couch 
               Smiling 
               Serene 
                               in being 
               reamed and 


Salt:


               Sleeping one callous moment. 


A woman:


               -- 20,000 of my menu                      jump! 


Salt:


               jingo slut! 
                                               the    THICK 
                                                                                               FERN. 


Kidlet: ( hiding red toes.)


               Hid them in a checkered box. 
               He checkered past did go 
                               with a checkered tie and 
                                                                               bowler 


Salt:


               What is the significance of March 1st? 


The sperm whale:


               The speed of sound 


Kidlet: (walking along a country lane:)


               with pantalones             
               checking headed up and low 
               in a.... 

We hear a muffled scream as the lights go black.


All:

buh-buhbuhb-buh-buh


Notes


[1] brothel prophet.