Dewey Rose

From Plastic Tub

Revision as of 18:07, 18 Aug 2006; view current revision
←Older revision | Newer revision→

He comes in swinging a small monkey on the end of a chain--it turns out to be a pen and notepad. Crumpled fedora following in short order, he tumbles out of the limousine with a boot-print on his ass. He is given nothing, which is more than he deserves, but less than he expects.

A Short Fuse

Smarmy fuck and unmitigated dog pile who got his first break from Balthazar Buehb. Dewey sported many a shiner due to his short fuse and hot temper. Consensus holds he should have been--and indeed he was, on several occasions. He conducted interviews up until 1997, when he mercifully succumbed to emphysema.

Eruption

After many failed attempts at becoming a screenplay writer, a thoroughly disgruntled Rose drifted from job to job. While tending bar at a local sportwriters' watering hole, Rose befriended Balthazar, a columnist for the Workers Weekly World News. Buehb introduced Rose to painting; Rose introduced Buehb to explosives. An increasingly delusional and violent Rose would later threaten Adid and Addisson many times.

Fueling Rumors

Stimso always referred to Rose as "Buehb's Bulldog." Buehb's participation and subsequent admonition for the leaders of the AA has always been fraught with problems and subjected to intense, critical scrutiny. Many see Buehb's quick distancing of himself from Dewey Rose as evidence of his AA inclusion; others point to Rose's rumored IRA connections.

Funeral Pyre

Rose's family tried to hold the AA responsible for his death. Their case, based as it was upon forgeries and outright lies, was rejected, albeit barely.

Usage

Dewey - Rose

    The following from a Buffalo paper describes a wedding which has been

briefly mentioned in The Patriot:

    "The marriage of Miss Genevieve Rose and DeWitt Greaves Dewey, was

solemnized Friday, Dec. 22, in Buffalo, but the Rev. Leo Alvin Gates, pastor of the Seneca street Presbyterian church of that city.

    "The bride is a daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Charles A. Rose of Cuba. She is

a graduate of the class of '20 of the Buffalo General hospital training school for nurses. The bridegroom is a son of Mr. and Mrs. Hartley F. Dewey of Union College. He is a graduate of Schenectady High school, class of '17, and of Union College '21, and a member of Beta Theta Pi. During the war, as second lieutenant, he was military instructor in the College of the City of New York. He is now in business in Dunkirk. Mr. and Mrs. Dewey spent the weekend at the home of his parents in the city."

-- Cuba Patriot, hand dated 1922.

See Also


The red-headed Irish punk could punch the lights out of moving truck. Twice.
Enlarge
The red-headed Irish punk could punch the lights out of moving truck. Twice.

Desiderata


Rose was born with three testicles--but died with only one. The missing pair is rumored to hang in the horse stables of an Irish hunt master in the County Cork.

As a grade-schooler, he was an obsessive chalk eater, stealing it every time his teachers turned their backs. His doctors later learned that he had a calcium deficiency due to excessive whiskey drinking.

Dewey Rose, GA (Zip Code 30364), sits between towns called Hard Cash and Goss, a hundred-some-odd miles from Atlanta.