The Greenbook (part 3)
From Plastic Tub
Collection of poetry by Steven Adkins (2003-2004).
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4
1992 – 6 months in DC Back in Tampa until 1994 There I lived in 1, (5 mos in Mexico) 2, 3 homes. Then New Mex. ‘til 98 3 homes 1998-2001 NY Three homes 2001-Present Toulouse, France 2 homes The interior of my heart is like the jagged tail of my wanderings the scrimping orgy of my emotions a perverse riot --we agitate for everyday erotics-- an eructus a shambling claim a gravestone upturned to reveal a moldering h --- There, in the light of regret the wicked hope of an angel in a miner’s shack it is these moments of brilliance that make it all worthwhile Umbilical redundance a wicked electronic plea And I have used that word before as I abandon my wife into the triangle of forgetting that stone triangle/CAD grey on iridescent blue located just off CUBA signifying nothing (and why did you spend so much time on that word) that library that shoe factory that small-town mineral museum that forgotten mall a high school on the edge of the farmlands unexpected villages still cropping up under the dappled elms She sleeps But doesn’t forget I cannot, am not, allowed to forget I have raped a woman and abandoned many I have moved in on a brother and bragged to another I have served humiliation and hurt, and the places I have gone the stimulation too much too much gain it’s all blended out An amber haze in a can --(·)-- One guilt blends into another Hiroshima – active – becomes Franco – passive Was this in the village surrounded on all sides by curtains a theater in the darkness in the round a place where failure is circumscribed let’s do it let’s scrunch up and flatten.... We buried the head in the dirt on the path towards Babylon the great whore; we don’t despise her but we fear her power in fact, we seek to get closer…. Ranging outward a constellation of 7 stars is a scimitar cutting away the dead wood our word for the expendable no cost in this destruction we use blood to feed thicker crops the grain in our bread each a seed for a many-faced head at the center of flowers a face, a sleeping face ringed by petals they have no use for us but we desperately need them scrying glasses magic mirrors perturbing interpretations zion hoagies for malnourished zealots food for thought for speculation and conspiracy a sleeping face in every bedroom seeing thru closed lids automatic reporting and as wee emerge from the tunnel into the sun and descend once more we cross the lines of transit inside the head of a worm this sick group of fanatics half-asleep and rocking looking backward at mirrors to see ahead Armageddonist erotics the dull science of death The Computer Woman visits The Great Ponds she casts her line and pulls up a tiny, smiling corpse A Nation of assassins, it seems, has chosen to defile this spot A Dumping Ground for miniature murders · · · · The waiting games are weighty ways…. (wisteria winding) tap tap tap reach for the revolver and decry culture spit upon the idols piss in the wastebin (there’s a war on soldier: boredom vs. time; at times like these one is almost tempted to pray for death) The logarithm raindance is the concentric circling of an immune shark and if there aren’t as many bees as there once were that’s not my fault I blame the aristocracy and their perversion of honey transmitted--wireless--into homes across Amerika Kulchur rise up and bite the lion sucking cock in dirty toilettes is a road to satori: hepatitis is cool Cool (too much so) for skool smoking in the boy’s room shooting smack at Johnny’s his leather jacket damp with sweat the small, plastic trashcan filled with vomit been sittin’ there for two weeks now that’s a good time (we don’t fall for no boozhwah junk) · · · · An electric whale sounds from the depths puffs its cheeks and send harpoons in all directions sailors pierced against the blue cardboard dome which is the sky The sky is a porcupine in reverse and an alligator is looking for a toothpick and the turtle-people guard the egg as always It’s a democracy of the quick It’s a gentle giant [I am Alex’s Imperfect Stenographer] Pebbles Steven Toulouse Mother Party Piglet Alex in a phase of mental diarrhea deep deep & deeper into yr lovely sugar pond (he digests) Steak and ale (a resto-rant worth visiting) in winter [in winter no no no no ok You met man] What? You said that is not right these people wanna know what we’re writing I think it’s awful let me tell ya you don’t know it’s awful it starts like this (laughter) he’s my Beautiful sec. she’s got luvly glasses but actually mmmm actually it starts like this lemme tellya learn shorthand you told me on your diploma how it starts is that I met Steve watching Naked Gun 21 the final score in a cosmic game of chance the end result a slightly tweaked chaos History is a quagmire and the stepping stones are hidden A fleeting barricade imperfection, a defect in a vessel of pure crystal interrupts the ring the tick of a hardened fingernail against glass The dialogue of unrewarded fingers rapping out rose sonatas across the air (grim and diabolical note-takers scribble furiously transcribing one out of every ten notes-- like trying to capture dust motes in a butterfly net) Purest in non-existence Tainted when sounded It is a song and a code the sound represents the notation which represents the billowing cloud of motes—pushing—a pulsing testicle ready to seed the earth, the ear · · · · We are hang-dogs haunches twitching legs kicking snarling bound tied-up and limited hedged in the gallows yard apples fall from the trees one-by-one in steady rhythm they sound out the drum roll this is our sentence Ho ho! My son is 10 today, in months just 30 days longer than his sojourn in the womb and father is like some caged, defeated animal the boy is in full Oedipal mode his little lips already fixed in serious grimace full of determination to do whatever it is he finds so important I haven’t yet figured out what that is usually it involves putting something in the mouth or fooling around with something dangerous last night he woke up screaming and it was mother who went to his solace coy papa has to work today must ride the metro with the vomiting multitude Esquirol, St. Cyprien, Patte d’Oie, Arènes Fontaine Lestang, Mermoz, Bagatelle, Mirail Reynerie, Bellefontaine, Basso Campo must walk in the office park where all the green is in weeds, and all the flowers are wild and the odd collection of smashed-to-bits film reels still litters the ground after months and months they will still be there when the boy is doddering these plastic potsherds testament to a future archeology and now Leland’s old man, too, is dead Live long and prosper and die happy these are the things I ask for from my special genie · · · · the grains of sand which are the stars you might say I am making a comparison but I am not I am exploiting a comparison already made I am not so interested in why we do this, or the mechanisms I am more interested in what might be called the implication metaphysical being only partly correct some kind of poetical revelation about the structure of everything realized from within inside of a pen inside this secret reactive world I expand and fill the spaces between stars with a head made of latex and putty This insipid life seen from within an inferior cocoon wasted years tumble backward into regret self-loathing the world is a mockery ....it doesn’t mock me yet I feel mocked everyone is a success **except me** I have no special ability or knowledge, talent or skill I don’t even take excessive amounts of drugs well there is a sad plan afoot within me my wife feels like she’s lost part of her life we sit without talking feeling futile vaguely ashamed at a loss I feel like a loser at 33 I have nothing which I can honestly say I have worked for it’s not the material things it’s the will and ability to get them I sit around and stew in dank juices slippery in the drain to be poked at with a coat hanger unblock the blockage make of myself a pleasurable fall guy here is a thinker a dictator a pope here is a magus who has been given enough rope a rough nape a knee, gruff these parts of the body sing a weird harmony of baritone and tenor scrawling nothing but painting in wet wide sheets (the color is green) the transom is bare · · · · We have many more miles to travel before the conclusions are well-spent “these lines keep me from madness” sometimes when the money is low, the alcohol too there is always the wedding bottle of wine and…. there is the gratuitous wastrel spending words like wooden nickels throwing around racial epithets like I was…. what? coming around the lake, my analysis is thin or at least it won’t be carried out in public I won’t serve my guilt up like a bleeding heart on a platter ---- occasional music There is a fire upon the apexes dead birds or forgotten muscles but not summits dangling violently by the heels a balcony with some sort of hanging plant with purple flowers ejected out of some other time you’d rather forget We shall fill this book quickly slowly If at all just add one more word like that to cheat throw threats overboard into seas of protection complete the puzzle get a reward connect the dots get a picture I will abuse them until they surrender or I am fired in the process (and having declared his love for fascism, he was roundly rebuked) (it wasn’t all simply fashion) ‘coz every time I see him there has been violence! darkened gutter prophet in the glim warm light of the candle we smoked crack in the bedroom the floor was wooden but unfinished and splintered the walls were bare and except for a bed was pretty much empty a TV sounded there was a mother somewhere anyway, I dunno why we were brought into it, but like most of the time it was grim I’ve been ripped off, punched in the head cops’ve trailed me knives have been pulled was caught cold in a motel parking lot all for that elusive omnipresent rock and I don’t know why or what I did it for the beautiful ugly night walks in summer were easy in winter, hard bottle hard like the prostitute who refused me a pipe or the many others who shorted me but when it was good, it was good the nostalgia my two years in Albuquerque working at the heart institute Paul, Kathy, Chris, Sylvia drinking in bars, getting meals, then back to Kathy’s impeccable pas to smoke weed and party We got into crack later K and I particularly, and we would flash money and get it if only Paul had stayed and I had stayed Paul was fresh out of college, Sylvia was in the middle of a terrible time with her husband there was drama in the unlikely yet obvious coupling but I was out of that even before NM, and that was 6 years ago After the 2nd attack elections were suspended and martial law was declared buying things became mandatory saving money was suspect cash was rare any political organization that did not give blind allegiance to the state or, in reality, to the party became re-classified as “terrorist” this is the history of the future: now this is America the beautiful, the free, home of the brave home of the happy meal pre-packaged air conditioned convenient subdivided = architecture as ideology live here, shop there, work someplace else no buses, not trains only automobiles allowed little castle in a yard in a subdivision of a subdivision a 3-mile island 10 minutes by car to the nearest grocery a supermarket, natch nestled in a bristling multicolored quilt of individual parking lots for more supermarkets car dealerships strip malls video rentals fast food places – here, there everywhere alike pet stores consume shut up and buy it’s your patriotic duty to buy as much as possible; 24-7 freedom’s waiting for you divide and conquer destroy the local economy with a Wal-Mart pay off the zoning board with the promise of jobs turn the self-employed into the employed and send the profit out of state homogenize consolidate hegemonize destroy watch the indifference set in the hopelessness the degradation the free market that is free in the sense that the first one is free the classic line of the strong-arm pusher the hard sell demoralize the people watch it all go to hell and blame it on the queers start a war when things get sluggish there will always be a terrorist under foot might as well be fightin’ rocks we can export what no one wants and shake our heads in wonder when it’s sent back on the tip of a boot in the ass It has taken a long time but we will arrive in Athens couplets with absurd rimes shouted near to the point of collapse an ancient library that distinctive step there is no work here only collection collecting lines like titles of books experiences people all disposable so as to recount a self-aggrandizing anecdote: did I ever tell you about the time I raped a girl? his brooding anger his hatred passive aggressive “then I suggest you get started, coz I’m just gonna get nastier and nastier” The Digue days of Summer walking along a wide concrete sidewalk by the river hemmed in on the write by a towering wall We were looking for no grail no source but a bar and we found it walking home we tried to set a tree on fire What is it that we are working toward what destiny are we creating (for there is not predetermined future but that which grows inevitable by the footsteps we have taken) The sky is grey the cars are smart the fruit is crazy and the Kingdom of Morocco is on my left These heinous rivers we have sent tumbling over into time rolling along grooves cut into the dry earth by an enormous taloned hand the hand invisible used to scoop me up and deposit me in a bar – 5 o’clock or so somehow I managed to stay put until I stumbled home somewhere after midnight maybe I’d sashayed down to the corner for a slice or two of pie the guy was from Nicaragua or maybe it was El Salvador but his pizza was the best in town two slices then I was back to the beer and whiskey or if I’d started on it, back to the gin I never got in a fight, never got laid, never played pool I just bantered with the crew of regulars and got slippery drunk on pints of Budweiser it was a miserable time yet I managed to find some truly fine moments in that place moments which have mostly all slipped away or coalesced in a blur -- like neon lights on puddles an oily smear (in a pig’s eye) I can’t say that I learned anything but I used to go back in and have a coke after I went upstate for a month They said come and see us anytime and they were probably uneasy but nevertheless seemed glad I just sipped soda and was calmer less mad, magnanimous and alone An ancient pig in heat slumbers fitfully in the muck dreaming – near delirium – of erotic interpenetrations tubes and fleshy cubes On the horizon of the ear, a a bell tolls it is a funerary note a nocturnal interment A monk, a lay sister and a hippy on a bicycle are looking for the nunnery A scruffy young man is sitting --half-hidden by the lamppost-- by the bus stop in front of the retirement home They ask him if the sisters are nearby and he indicates yes, in bad French and with a bony finger, they are “just there” across the street The monk thanks him, and they leave and the young man turns back to his furtive task and grins He collects his soil from the brick planter and heads home to to take care of his stolen plants Alex Lost in an ant colony we skirmish and wait for the giant to step on our neighbors King of the Ants You are the king the almighty the powerful the leader that we all honor I bow down to the King of the Ants ---- two deuces smart on the ripside which is to say to input nonsense for the wire we are bargaining for cheap chits tickets with numbers…. letters…. desperate chance…. hope…. ---- sitting in a grey conference room with a wall of windows onto an atrium full of rocks and bamboo the Zen antidote to the sharp angles the white lab coat this is IT information storage and retrieval speed, precision, efficiency perhaps the rock garden isn’t such an opposite after all in any event their coffee machine mixed a bland brew and the students have not arrived I will give them 5 minutes and then je me case et pourquoi pas? my telephone is fucked up and when I call I’m shunted straight into the voice mail the répondeur France Telecom maybe my phone can’t hang up… I know the feeling always ready to receive receive, it receives nothing and where do we go after death and why are we killing time by filling lines? I should have never abandoned this thin ink…. this gloating monster I, only slightly a-glow, am washed out by tired an sneaking hurried moments discrete in all the wrong places at all the wrong times – which are in fact the only right places and times because the tables I prepare are never used I pace instead prepare without preparing for the nothing that always comes Slowly, ever so slowly the task is being completed the time is drawing nigh incomplete megaphone leaves sturdy hands a-crumble leads sturdy men astray the albino female, there, in the back of the car see the rhythmic gesture see the tappa tee tap tap of her long fingers upon the glass could be mistaken for a cleansing rain that hard rain gonna fall we’ve heard so much about the tail end is being secured no more whipping in the wind drums born upon the wind the django telegraph and tappa tee tap the refrain is picked up and carried along by a man who changes it into a special way to aimlessly kick a can down a sewer grate and that is how it’s begun this revolution of ant people getting’ ready to hunker down under the flood wait there generations before re-emerging from their slumber: put the cataclysm engine into motion yet again 4 down, 1 to go How much tired semaphore will we watch for tonight from atop a distant tower constructed of beams and held together with lashings tightly-wound sculptures in rope The wood is not a part of the design but necessary to give the fluid material its form can we then ignore it and say it is irrelevant when without it our sculpture would rest an idea? And is the idea enough? Even if we could remove the wood and let the sculpture remain, the realization once needed it and its removal does not negate that is once was there because what would be left retains its memory in order to maintain its integrity LATER THAT DAY…. A third Templar is given the gun; trying to see the other side of the green river he is half-blind and half-cocked A Mexican standoff in the making three duelists in a soon-defunct love triangle The nadir was at 7 it breezed our hair – we ended up with flat-top buzz-cuts The preternatural frog guards the entrance his eyes are alert a voice, her long legs some kind of wonderful enigma bursts like a flower over the city it is the crypt-tic the spasm of impending death some call it a mushroom some call it the yellow umbrella an upset stomach an aching sphincter an abrupt flummox and intriguing riddle confusion lies in pills awash in a chaos of papers scattered figures of my life sliding inexorably into loss there’s no more in here yet somehow a bit more is squeezed out a fat girl in tennis shoes stands by the door worrying her cheek with her tongue (perhaps it is afraid it will be eaten – has a mouth ever devoured itself?) two oval-faced thin girls stand by the other door they wear vaguely hostile, idiot expressions “It’s hot” one says, a propos of nothing a short burst of half-finished phrases – chatter then a sullen silence you will never see your ______. [edited, for the sake of prophecy] to trump prophecy a desperate policy In the light of the green faerie (and the blinking of the screen) she lay there, tossing in the thick heat of the night her negligee flinched up about the curves of her nearly-perfect ass poised as if ready if not for sleeping and I finished off my drink and turned off the computer and turned towards the bed loins as thick as the air mischievous grin on my face leaned down and eased myself behind her I cupped my mouth over her “chatte” and gave a breathy little kiss she squirmed, near to being pissed but she realized before the expression and twisted, a weird groaning giggle on her lips as she fell almost immediately back to sleep · · · · Beautiful fields beautiful fields of stone flowers stretching out over the grassy hills large swaths bounded by pines · · · · My sojourn in the Wilderness is a bucket of thieves Portuguese man o’ war Is it a ship? a type of jelly fish? Or an angry young man pacing like a clown? Is there too much control trying to write the history of the world Congratulations to the cheese The ivory mountain is falling into the sea Nothing is melting but they eyes in the hills 100 years of dysentery his forgotten apocalypse a complex Cars drill by in the thick air noisy and annoying because this was a village before it was a widened road between soulless “developments” The city reconstitutes itself a reassemblage of parts -- torkeling is a meaningless collection of phonemes which to me suggests the ingestion of drugs thru the nose and which for you means nothing (no more, nada, rien Malgré le fait qu’il faut defois, le faire No one seems particularly happy because they are not ebullient which doesn’t mean they are not happy maybe they are just honest This mysterious dysentery they call nurses “bone-reapers” and everyone drinks Pastis in this bar there is not creation despite the spilling of ink it’s not a readjustment to writing itself but writing with the pen the heavyweights muscle in shoulders square like Stalinist murals facing off with the bosses their greed makes radicals of men and women who merely desire the pursuit of happiness and she was rail thin almost grotesquely so ice-blue eyes a matter-of-fact approach to social interaction that was as unyielding, potentially, as an icepick and I thought she is the kind of decent person who could throw people into ovens if asked and convinced that it was a solution there is no white-rose in the lapel of her business suit just a pair of pliers and a compact there will be not extraction of teeth hear by shabby looking people money and intelligence and coldness but that’s not entirely fair for even the torturer has her feelings The uranium eyesore the aching pinky arthritis has kept me cold its’ fingers, not the mouth which records this monkey chatter perhaps not the shortest route between 2 lines perhaps not the most honest but.... but what? uptight control of baser emotions? erase “niggers” and “rape” and “dirty whore”? Or, is it that by their absence we assume suppression, and invent the existence of things which are not there? let’s renege on this agreement it’s a stale, useless bet and we abscond, belly full w/o paying the cheque It draws closer, agonizingly slow fake Latin be damned “agonistes”: slim meniscus about the drowning depths greasy like the glaring eye of a bird (And are they even aware of how shitty they can be?) Flying high! an enormous shoe invades my living room growing daily it’s beginning to block out the sun A monkey god both playful and sinister a spiteful and vengeful creature even ignoring it can get you involved the tar baby phenomenon drowning in underwater yells with fist once-thrust mired in the goo (trailing white ectoplasm like dough being pulled apart) An attitude of defiance on a hot day things are blowing up all over the place make something small bigger or make something big many small things it’s all the same we lose perspective of the grains but see the worlds in-between what comes between letters but the hidden letters of the alphabet; the language of the animal gods whose hideous speech goes unheard of by men · · · · Meat fries in the pan, sizzles pops Morrison croons with four pack of reds-a-day Voice Humid air is silent telephone is silent a barely audible murmur from the TV voices from outer space therein lies the ejaculate rub no fun to be had no more nose for trouble zany misadventures no more collage ½-realized pemoes zest for living drained in lack not slack but lack un manque de soul toujours miniscule under the half-forgotten death dreams of sky, irreverent whispers which no longer count for anything yeah, me too Jim, down so goddam long a dog’s dick looks like a satellite…. cool longing for the redemptive coda coz it’s all gone long gone…. The Greenbook has been a collection of frogs in bur--- they hum and whistle and fall down, the slow acceleration of heat in the pot, over the flame regret, regret, regret gets us a mediocre life charge on! make your mistakes and hurt people or be a bridge to nowhere – that falls (false, all false, all false) I. Two young girls were being menaced by the kind of dimwitted hulking thing you see in bad movies extremely powerful, but slow-moving I came to their aid, yelling help as a man in a red Jeep rode by and scared but willingly carried us away We were on some kind of sandy peninsula with bamboo architecture and palm fronds When the man in the red Jeep stopped to drop us off, there was a note waiting for me I had evidently interfered in the wrong scenario scrawled in crayon, the note read, simply: “We are going to kill you. – The Blue Brotherhood” II. I found myself riding a bus, no a train to the end of the line rusted iron bridges, murky water, kibble of industry I found myself with Arnold Schwarzenegger: my father I joke with him and corrected his English He sped away on a motorcycle and left me with my mother, a starlet of some renown She embraced me, lustily, her breasts full and round with bright red nipples They were cartoons Our embrace was loving, sexual, we were sliding down a thorny cliff into the sea III. I found myself in a vast empty place standing on a tower made of wood from the four directions of the globe they came marching, without end as far as the eye could see, marching Corpses in Nazi uniforms in various states of decay they cam in straight lines, voracious stumbling into the tower, falling into disarray they clawed at one another and their mouths gnashed in hunger I kind of body-surfed away they did not seem interested in the living they just clawed themselves into writhing piles at the base of the tower, some kind of beacon in a dead planet IV. A café near the railroad track that brought me to this place I was a chickenhead working there, a busboy I was a Negro and a hunchback and normally well-liked, but my moans began to annoy the patrons, my memories of the living dead, the horror of their empty hunger The barmaid tried to soothe me with a sparkling water and an aspirin an enormous block which broke into chunks in my mouth the horrible taste of aspirin on my teeth and tongue Opening the page of doodles screaming for something to say “Oh, he can express an idea well, but he has no ideas to express” He uses pseudolligraphy as an excuse – I need silence, to create when he only wants to create silence Noise on four legs stalking…. Adonai, Megillah jumping Lord on high “….leaping and dancing before the Lord….” We use the book as a weapon to smite the smiter, reflect hate with a mirror of onion-skin paper (all that about peeling back several layers….) It comes from your face, falling off from radiation burns strange tumors like silvered domes reflecting a Moorish paradise which never existed among the palm and date trees burning away by the rivers and the Earth to swallow it all up with a regurgitation of plants and flying insects The wicked openness of it all the “vast plain” so-often repeated Can this verdant collection of reborn wood contain the multitude of liquid poured over it The black water (We give ourselves too much credit) Half-drunk in the afternoon over a d.r.b.’s brew Eye of newt and tooth of eel, wing of frog, canned pig’s squeal witch’s tit in brass brassiere (and that’s not even what it’s called) This time, the revolution wasn’t televised because it wasn’t expected from the quarters from whence it came it snuck up behind the cameraman Hallelujah! (apocalypse averted, if only temporarily) ....the schematics for our time-machine – were....off.... (and the tooth-fairy—real—is losing a bundle, what with the crystal meth, and the radiation) Eyeball in an isotope—zinging about under insect parameters: parabolas twisted by the drunken bumblebee…. I am the worst of my kind Drifting into levers behind a moth-eaten curtain A space filled with lumbering machines dangerous to behold, to eyes to hold to fingers to be to souls The soul is a strange calculus of 2 eyes and ten fingers We enter stranger places now dangerous lands metal hands sacred cows Punctured So many deflated wands Wands breathing milky white blood into indefinite horizons people with mist and cacti ….infinity is a prison Swaying under the satellites the electric eye so storied so fabled photograph this text from above read the semen-stain on your comforter -- there is a premium on comfort because there is so little to be found there is so much to pay for water, air, minerals, plush, stuffed human companions warmed with a plug in the sun and vibrating from within by earthquakes and since I came outdoors I have ceased to write too much noise too much light too much…. too much an animal rising a vegetable kingdom the degenerate human speech of women dressed in yellow it is not their fault it is not our fault the individual is exonerated the society is exonerated God, therefore, is condemned We ceased to blame each other and came to despise the source and to fill up the holes of hate with love for the effects of a defective cause a prime mover that never existed save in the minds of the siphylid and the greedy claws of the cynically strong…. We retreat from these empires, we the people, despise, hate….despise and hate as only the righteous can do, with wives and husbands and children….we don’t want to kill other wives and husbands and children to please the impotent compensations of the so-called “elected ones” The hive is in slow revolt, revolted, agonized bum-flustered, and not so benign (anymore) Secret whispers in the caves at the edge of the metropolis Cities of Gold and Lead Mushroom Planets The eternal child is a lover of Peace and Freedom, Respect and Tolerance Responsibility and reverence 12 laws, ten commandments 1,200 interpreters All willing to mock each other in their special claim to truth Love thy Neighbor and do unto him as you would have him do unto you And die not for their point of view but for their Freedom to express it What ever happened to the apparently “quaint” and “naïve” maxims? Too many hard challenges, easy to adhere when conformity rules Less so when diversity emerges unchallenged, my view will always hold but the strength of my castle cannot be determined without the vigorous challenge of unforeseen ideas— but these are not enemies and the only siege is in our heads the Kulturkampf is a small mouse we can allay with a new arch, not golden, yet royal (and all that is terrible and dull)
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